Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
your room smells of hookers.
And success
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize