absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
