do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize
