i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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