sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
