god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
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