What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
