He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
she told me i tasted like america
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
