just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
