Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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