Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
