Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
