You work out of a Hotel?
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
