A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
