Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
