where am i from again
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
I smell like Dick and happiness
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
