pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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