was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
