at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize