I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
