If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
