Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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