After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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