Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
