Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize