Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Randomize
