Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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