I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
