stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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