we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
