We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
is that a dick in a sweater?
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
