The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
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