So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
