She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Randomize
