My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
