what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Randomize