That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
