3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Randomize
