Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Houston, we have a blender
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize