Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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