they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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