i just had sex bonerless
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize