I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
