Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize