You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
