Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
