I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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