But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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