I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
