I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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