I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
