He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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