Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
